Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Randomize
