Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
