just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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