He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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