If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
