school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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