i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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