Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
