know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
