um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
