Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
