Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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