would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
