if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
