Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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