Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
