i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
