Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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