Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
