everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
