I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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