god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
