Christians are straight up FREAKS
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
