I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize