I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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