oh god the rape fog is back!
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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