if i can run in heels then i can drive
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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