The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
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