I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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