i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
