just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
