Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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