Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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