More tranny stories later!
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
