This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize