grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
