yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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