My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
These tits shall not be calmed
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
