yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
