dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
