Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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