if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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