the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize