If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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