I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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