She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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