This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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