Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Randomize
