I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
