they need to just BURY HIM!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
