I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
